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Who Am I?

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  • Twilight
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Who Am I?

"Who? Who is but the form following the function of what and what I am is..."

Well, what am I? A husband? A Son? A Father? A brother? An Australian?

Yes, I suppose. But metaphysically what am I? To continue the quote;
"a man in a mask."

We all wear masks. The "workplace" mask, the "church-place" mask. The "soccer" mask and the "school" mask. The "drinking friends" mask and the "movie friends" mask. What I am is a man in a mask.

Yet this raises many question of itself. What form the mask? Of what substance is its making? Is it a smiling mask made of sadness? Is it a grotesquery made of love? Is it distress made of joy? Where must one begin to be able to answer this question? I cannot see my mask because I look through it. So I need a mirror.

In the physical world we can see what our face wears only by looking into a mirrored surface. Whether a still pool of water or shining metal, it is our reflection that allows us to see the face we present to others. So for the metaphysical mask I need a metaphysical mirror. It is often said that art mirrors society and society mirrors art. But am I art to look to society to see myself? I can only hope not or else my mask is a hideous monster made from the broken lives of the innocent. What about others people? Do their masks mirror my own? Can I determine what form my mask and what substance in its making by looking at you? If I look to the best of people then I will think the best of myself. If I look to the worst of people then I will think the worst of myself. But that does not tell me what mask I am wearing, only what mask other people are wearing. I then have to assume that I am the same as others.
No, locating my identity perceptions in others is the same as staring at a photograph whilst doing your hair. No matter what you've done it looks the same every day because it is no true reflection of yourself, just a frozen picture of a time.

So how do I determine my mask? What can possibly give a clear reflection of the mask I wear? External sources are either blurry or lies. So with no external source of relflection I am left only at looking for one internally. Only, I have already said that I cannot see my mask because I look out of it.
But I can feel it. I can feel it on my face. The texture against my skin. I can run my hands over it to determine the shape, building up an image in my mind of what it looks like. If I close my eyes, and look at my mask with other senses I can determine what form it takes. Then, because this is a metaphysical mask, I need to listen to how I feel, what I think. I can determine the substance of the mask because I have made it. It looks and feels like, and is made up of me. I am that mirror.

I am a reflection of the mask I wear, and the mask I wear is a reflection of me.

But... who am I?

Edited by Caulfield, 11 August 2012 - 06:10 AM.




  • Twilight
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The mask is a creation and we are all actors.



    Celestial Power

  • Twilight
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If I did not wear a mask the brilliance of my being would drive men to madness and women to lust for me...and madness.

Truthfully, I have a hard time keeping my mask fully on, I am reminded when I see my reflection that I must come across as crazy or weird to others as my personality does not match the way I look at all. I have tried to alter my apperance to be more appropriate but it is not easy.



    হিজরা, Bissu, Kinnar, Niizh manidoowag, خنيث

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My personality doesn't match the way I look at all. So I generated a few new ones that do. Yet not separate but part of the whole. We all have such facets.

Knowing yourself is a feedback loop of observer observing the observer. Through observing yourself you change so that what you observed is no longer true but replaced by something new. Obviously this makes it hard to do.

I've discarded a lot through this. There was a time I entertained facets that were taken with psi-vampirism and such metaphysical constructs. To me these were ideological toys, fun to play with, not something to invest in. Being bright I was able to create some pretty complex rationalities around them but I purged all such things for a desire to cling to a central axiom of pure self-honesty. I know that I am a damaged person and that in some ways I am and will always be broken but I'm ok with that for the most part. To know yourself takes painful honesty to achieve to any real degree. To admit to yourself your flaws and limitations. Then knowing them, to help patch them and push the boundaries of them. And change.
  • Beorht likes this




  • Darkling
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Well if anyone figures it out( what and who it is they
really are) please let me know and I'll decide if it's right for me... :D



    Anarchist Superman

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People are always so concerned with who and what they are. You don't see animals share the same obsession. They're content to just be. Why can't we just be the same? I don't think we find much peace of mind before we learn to be content with just being, and I don't think we learn to be present in the now before we learn to let go of all those speculations.

All that I am is me, even if it contradicts itself. Human beings are full of contradictions. We can be anything and anyone, and in the eyes of others we are often not the same as the one we see ourselves. In short enough time we're not here altogether, so what does it all matter? We're like tiny dustbunnies in an ever-expanding universe, that is way bigger than we can ever comprehend anyway. So incignificant, yet so self-important. Trust me, it doesn't matter. Life is just a ride. Enjoy it while it lasts, but don't get all bent up over it.
  • Mysterium likes this