It's my usuall Sunday night/Monday morning. Of course, I had a 7am flight (now 8am), so I stayed up through the night, as I absolutely cannot for the life of me will myself out of bed at 4:30am so I can shower, dress, and get to the airport in ample time.

In any case, I stayed up... it's easier for me to work through a day with little sleep the night before than try to wake up at that god-awful hour.

I took my shower at 4:30, got dressed, threw my folded laundry into my bag, and was out the door by 5. I get to the airport at 5:30, and was way ahead of schedule. (Usually, it takes me an hour to get out the door... maybe I don't fold my clothes the night before? Can't remember.)

I get to the self-service kiosk and swipe my ID so it will spit out a ticket. I saw some red flashing error, and thought that I somehow blew up the kiosk (I've had bad luck with computers recently). A double take revealed that my flight was delayed. Despite this, I was still feeling pretty good.

I was talkative... which is unusual for me. I smiled, yes, smiled when I greeted or was greeted, even to the TSA dudes... yes, I said that I smiled at the TSA employees when they said hello. I even had some friendly banter with a couple of them while I waited in line for the metal detector. Despite me being 'randomly selected' for 'additional screening' (read: additional waste of time), I was still all smiles, and generally in a great fucking mood.

I'm still like that, and I'm starting to freak myself out.

Even so, it's kind of nice. I wish I knew a way to preserve it. At this point in the week, more specifically, the hour preceding my flight, I'm always miserable.

I didn't really do anything different last night or this morning (except fold my laundry when it came out of the drier), and had a fairly bad 1-day weekend. I have no reason whatsoever to be even remotely happy, but here I am, smiling like an idiot.

Seriously, WTF!?

I have researched something on this subject and discovered that all kinds of things effect our bodies and minds!

For example I get attacked by a strong hit of paranoia, extreme fear, inner disorder and emotional breakdown
every time someone dies about in my half of town.
The bigger the sorrow the harder it strikes me.
These are the people that I never heard of yet I got used to it!

For example, one day I felt like something is going to happen to the world. A meteor is gonna strike or some nuclear war is gone burst.
I jugged a couple of sedatives but same thing only more intense!
Tomorrow a friend called me and told me that our friend's dad has killed himself.

It took me while to figure it out (and I do not expect any of you to believe me) but the same thing I felt the day before tsunami in the East. What was that like 2005? I can still remember the fear and disorder I felt that day.



But anyway, Look just how the moon effect some people... most of people!
So if you want to know the perfect way to be always happy and smiling just do this:

Say fuck it to absolutely everything! Everyone you love, everything you ever wanted, every moral and every code!
Even say fuck it to yourself!
When you do that nobody can harm you and your slappy happy!

Inacceptance of what is...That is where most suffering and bad moods come from.

I have heard a million people say the same thing.."there are simply things throughout the day that you can't accept totally" but fail to realise that it is not "things" you fail to accept...it is life as it happens.

You get in a bad mood off about the way people drive on the road; you get in a bad mood that your coffee doesn't taste the way you expected; you get in a bad mood that your neighbor is loud; you get in a bad mood because your life isn't the way you had wanted it to be....

I think it's important to remember that as good as you feel right now, that feeling of euphoria is not going to last forever. And well it shouldn't - we often fail to recognize that we learn most of our valuable life lessons when we are suffering.

To quote a great Buddhist sage, "Suffer what there is to suffer, and enjoy what there is to enjoy."

Life is an experience that's both rare and precious - make the most of it while you can, because you may never have this opportunity again.