A few questions I have for all you psychic vamps out there, if you don't mind answering them:

What does being a psychic vamp mean to you? What is it like to begin to realize that you might not be like everyone else? What changes once you become aware of that part of yourself?



... I've been curious about this for a while, and the idea of writing a book centering around the concept of a psychic vampire has been something I've wanted to do. So I'd really appreciate any and all responses. :)



Athena

I am primarily sanguinary, but do use psi to fill in when I don't have access to a donor.

It's a very scary thing when you first awaken to what you are. Fears that you are insane, you are defective, people telling you (if you are brave enough to mention it to anyone) that you are a parasite.

It's not the glamorous thing that some people believe to feel that you need to use other's energy in order to remain healthy.

You really should talk to Michelle Belanger. She's a well known psi who has written a couple of books on the subject.

It doesn't mean very much actually, just that I sometimes have to make people around me miserable or do things to elicit emotional responses from them. It also means I should meditate every day, but I've noticed that nowadays (about 4 years since the awakening) I can go a full week with no meditation without having too many issues.

It also means I've had a headache for pretty much the past four years ... dunno why exactly, but the awakening and the headache rather coincide.

Don't remember far back enough to know what exactly changes and how it feels.

you're just insane.

Ooh, you could check out this guy.

http://www.konstantinos.com/

I read his book Vampires: The Occult Truth. Had some interesting stuff about psi vamps in there.

He also has a myspace. I know because he's on my friends list.

Ath... you're abusing the fact that I'm now spineless. lol...


For me... realizing hasn't really been like finding another personality like you asked about. It's really was more of "Oh... so that's why doing that makes me feel lousy. I'll start doing this."
In a way... I suppose it's a bit like being Diabetic. (And this is a stretch, mind you.) Insulin keeps them in check rather the way energy keeps me in check. They don't take their shots, blood sugar skyrockets and hell breaks loose. I don't feed and my depression flairs, I get sick easily, I get tired more easily, etc etc etc.


Doesn't really mean a LOT I guess... To me anyway. Just... that I yam what I yam. *shrug*

Being a psychic vampire feels like being a normal person to me. With perks.

To know that if I become exhausted, I can take energy from those around me... It gives me a sense of power, but it is a power I don't abuse.

Also, when I feel another's emotions I need to try and separate them from my own. Sometimes they are confused with my own, so I take on the moods (and sometimes thoughts) of others around me.

When I began to realize that I could do these things, the first things going through my mind were questioning if it was real. I wanted to believe it even if it wasn't true, but I needed to know that it was. After a long time of doubting and testing I confirmed that what I could do was real, and accepted it.

The only change in me I could really notice was the new control I had over it after I realized it and began testing and practicing what I could do. It would be quite dangerous if one couldn't control it, wouldn't it?

Of course, this is only a summary of what it's like. Without going into detail on the thought processes and feelings behind it all.

I agree with Hellarchy. The empathy bit can be quite a bitch.

I've already checked out her website, and she seems like an excellent resource. I've asked for her first book as a birthday present, and I'm trying to talk as many people as I possibly can.

Being a vamp, at least a psi vamp, seems like a very disturbing experience for most who go through it. The feeling that you can hurt people, that you need something that affects another person so deeply and that no one can really explain the first time they experience it, seems like the people who feel this awakening inside of them are changed forever in some part. Psys aren't really another species, but they're special people with special circumstances around them that have made them what they are.



Have you ever tried relieving the headache through feeding? I know you can take too much, but if you feed from a crowd, I've been told that the energy they emanate seems to be almost limitless.



I have actually heard of him, though I wasn't aware that he wrote about vampires. I'll have to check his stuff out. Thanks. :)



I get what you mean.. that you've come to terms with what you are and what you need to do to take care of yourself. You don't hurt people, nor do you take too much. You sate yourself and that's it. (Tell me if I'm off here.)



How did you test it? What finally convinced you that it was something real, and not something that you'd made up for yourself? I'd be interested in the thought processes and everything behind it. You're welcome to give me a call sometime, or catch me on messenger... though I enjoy phone interviews a great deal more. There's information that comes through on a voice that doesn't come through in writing. But whatever you're comfortable with is awesome for me. :)



I guess people handle empathy in different ways. I'm quite the empathic person, and I find it useful. I like it most of the time, because it allows me to gauge what people need from me in that moment, if anything.

It's strange, how I talk to people and though I get so many questions answered, more crop up and more inspiration starts to boil in my head. Some more questions that I'm curious about, if you all wouldn't mind answering:

How do you feed? What entry points do you use? By entry points I mean like the neck is a classical entry point for sanguine vampires.

Can psy vamps reproduce in any special way, or will a psy vamp who has a kid in the usual way pass on any special genes to their child that will predispose them to any kind of vampirism?

I'd be very grateful if people could share any and all experiences concerning their vampirism and someone they love(d) who wasn't any sort of vampire. Did you feed off them? Did this part of you make the feelings any different than most people experience?

I've heard people say that they can feel the energy "rise". What does it look like when it rises? Do you use your own aura to absorb it, or another special mechanism?

Thanks to everyone who has responded thus far... this has given me a ton of material for the ideas in my head. Hope you guys don't mind answering more of my questions.


Thena

I'll answer this for now, the others later, perhaps.

When I first started I fed from the moon, then the sun, then I realised I could feed off of the very air around me. Then it became too little and I fed on my entire neighbourhood at once. Now it often happens that the entire city (300k people) isn't enough for me to draw energy from, but this could just be my lack of practice lately. The most interesting bit is that it seems like the more regular I am with feeding the greater the headache, and it's especially strong during feeding. I believe this to be because when I'm well fed I can sense my surroundings, while feeding especially, and it overloads my brain.

hehe feeding...
is that why your farts stink so much?

Yes dear, that's why ... do wonder about yours though.

My farts are pure magic

Mmm. I can feel the energy of them from here.

I'd be glad to catch you on Athena... and I will definitely consider a phone call with you.

So do you actually feel better if you don't feed, since in that case you're more unaware of your surroundings? And how often do you feed, if it induces this overload and the resulting headache? When's the last time you fed?

Also, I know that with people, you use their auras to feed off of their energy. How do you feed off of things that are less concrete and harder to access, like the moon, sun, and air?



Thanks, Hellarchy... you gave me a lot of great material which gave me quite a few ideas. ^_^

It's better when I'm more aware of my surroundings because it gives me almost prophetic capabilities and often the ability to instantly see a solution to a given problem even before I fully understand the problem (very helpful at work). I used to feed every day but have gotten a bit lazy and try to do it as often as I remember to nowadays. On average every other day I'd say and the headache is really something I've totally gotten used to.

I don't know what I use to feed, can't see auras, never could (despite having been told by people that I can) I jsut concentrate very hard on something that I know has a lot of energy and see it flowing into me like a stream of pure energy (usually visualised as light) and often a vortex of several different streams forms around me and collapses in on itself and into me at the top ... quite a sight really when it's being fed by several thousand streams.

However I don't think I could handle such vortexes some years ago, it probably wouldn't have ended well ...

I know this wasn't addressed to me, but everything is composed of energy...everything. Storms generate a wonderful energy that some can use.

I'll be glad to answer anything I can, but as I said I only use Psy to fill in.

All vampires (in my opinion) are simply human beings with a different need than most. *shrugs* some disagree.

That sounds beautiful. So, you've always been able to just concentrate (though perhaps with less effort as time went on and you gained experience) on objects that possess energy and thus absorb the energy in the form of light? Also, have you become able to draw more energy from one thing as time has passed and you've gotten used to feeding?





I've come to believe that, myself. Vampires aren't a separate species, as they've been written as in popular culture. The "real" types of vampires that a person can find are just normal people with specific and possibly peculiar needs or tastes.

And, if anyone should see this thread after this point, know that any of these questions are fair game for anyone, even if I address them to one person at the time that I'm writing them in my posts. I've always known a lot of sanguine and psychic vampires, but I've never known a lot about what their experiences are like. I guess it never mattered. *shrugs*

But please, I'm completely curious about several different types of personal experience. Everyone goes through a different set of experiences when they awaken to any part of themselves, and because I'm writing a book that will involve several different people of varying backgrounds, I'm trying to get a good representation of awakened people.

So, please... if you feel like posting just a tad of extra information, please do. I appreciate every bit of information I can glean from this thread. :)



Athena

No not always, from just before the awakening when I was starting to dable in psi manipulation. Strangely enough I'm not more capable of drawing energy from any one thing anymore, perhaps for an instant, now it takes a LOT of energy for me to be able to feed ... my theory is that I feed so quickly and so much that a single source simply doesn't do.

Sorry for the delay... end of term murders me in my sleep sometimes. o.o

So when you feed now, you're like a starving child, yes? Hungry, but not finding enough food to sate the hunger...? Correct me if I'm wrong here.

Athena: Please pm me if you wish to talk about it in more depth. :)