OOC: This thread works like this... It's either kill or be killed, god modding is totally allowed, if you want to cut someone’s legs off then do it, if you want to grow new legs after someone cuts off your legs then do it... Lets make it funny, lets make it unique, but most of all, lets make it gruesome!

Aaron stands in the center of the coliseum, chainsaw running, waiting on the first challenger…

A huge monster, a pale gelatones blob, with one huge yellow eye oozed up, it might have been frightening, had it not had an unfortunante resemblance to a fried egg gone horribly wrong, a maw who's interior was coverd with millions of sharp teeth

Aaron tosses a grenade in the blobs direction *KA-BOOOOOM* Chunks rain down from the heavens "Mmmmmmm, tastes like chicken"


OOC: If you give the poster in front of you a chance you're gonna die...

The blobs quickly merged, back into what now looked much morre like a scrambled, rather than poached egg
"I will destory you" It gurgled flopping on him

Lady Red entered the arena clad only in a fuzzy nightie, stilletos, and a matching thong. All of which were red. Red's hair was infact blonde and long. As she reached a safe distance away from Aaron, machine guns popped out of her boobs (heehee Fem bot!!!). She aimed and shot thousands of bullets at Aaron. He and the blob now looked like Swiss cheese.

With chainsaw in high gear Aaron began making wide arcs through the gelatinous blob, all the while humming the theme from All in the family. Once the blob was in nice size chunks Aaron builds a small fire and decided to cook up some blob for lunch, With his mighty wok Aaron made enough to feed the crowd… He was truly their champion!

One of the blobs was quietly creeping up to litrally come back and bite him in the ass as it took a huge bite it's miniscule face lit up with joy

The blob bit Aaron in the ass but he felt no pain, for what the blob didn't know was that Aaron had lost his ass in Vietnam and had it replaced with a new cybernetic, state of the art, super ass with blob destroying capabilitits. As soon as the blob took a bite Aaron's ass, his ass turned in to a giant robot and consumed the blob before changing back into it's normal sessy ass self...

opie casually strolls in dressed like B.A. Barrackas (even the mohawk) And fires an rpg into the center of the battlefield. As the fires burn he gets out his package of Nathans and has himself a wienie roast.

The blob happening to have the ability to eat through metal as it burst out large than ever it became an egg, sitting there quite inoffensivly

Running out of the flames Aaron cuts Opie in half with his chainsaw leaving a trail of viscera as he went...
*mmmmmmmmm viscera*
"anyone got any toast?"

Red walked over to the wienie roast and smiled, "Hello there big boy!" As she spoke she aimed her jubilees toward the roaster. She smiled and fired shots directly at his wienie.

The egg hatched, to reaveal a tiny inoffensive, pink rabbit, quite normal, exept for it's gigantic fangs, it swallowed red whole, remaining the same size

as new legs grow out of opies torso he becomes very angry with Aaron even though when opies penis grew back he realized he was hung like horse. Opie considers the options of killing Aaron or going to film some porn and decides it is time to go find some slutty women to begin his new career. Opie tosses a grenade over in Aarons general direction and leaves. As Opie walks away from the fray he hears Aaron proclaim "OH SHIT" and then there is a loud explosion.

Alright kiddos... I'm going to move this to Eros Noir now seeing as how we have massive explosions throwing body parts all over the place and each other destroying private areas of others. I'm sure you'll get more replies over in that section anyways.

Have fun.

~Swan

*Runs around lost* Where am I! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH

Red slowly but surely crawled out of the rabbits ass. As soon as she was fully out she stepped on the rabbit's head, impaling it to the ground. She smiled and shot bullets into it's carcass. She smiled and turned around. She stared at Opie, and shot into the back of his knees, making him fall to the ground.

The rabbit slowly melted down the metal and turnd it into a miniture suit of armour as it nibbled happilly at opies maimed legs

OOC: I was told that this thread has to have a purpose to stay alive so here is the mission, we are going to be in search of Waldo, he is hidden somewhere in the arena and we have to find him before time runs out and the world is consumed by Jaboo, the world consumer, who is the father of Waldo and who is pissed that I kidnapped his son, "twice removed on his mothers side of course"... Anyway, let the mayhem continue and remember to look for waldo while you are re-growing body parts and such...

IC: Aaron sits on the grenade and snuffs it out with his super ass, then runs and kicks the rabbit!

The rabbit makes a quick lunge at his groin region coming away with a mouthful of mr. happy and running happilly away hunting for waldo

opie's legs heal and he begins to look for that damned rabbit. Fetch me the holy hand grenade he yells over to Aaron. As Aaron gets the holy hand grenade Opie starts reading from the sacred scrolls to activate the weapon. Upon acytivation we through the holy hand grenade over at the rabbit and watch the pink fur and guts rain down over waldo and his stupid fucking hat.

The rabbit quickly reforms into something resembling a pixie with large lead rams hoens, landing on Opies head, mashing him heavilly ground

That fucking rabbit bit off me cock, how dares it... *notices all the pink fur lying around* "nice job Opie!" and then Aaron re-grows his Mr. Winky, twice as big this time... fuck that... Mr winkie is now ten feet long and three hundred puunds of pulsing weaponry... I crush the pixie and Opie with my enormus schlong!

The pixie happening to have wings twice as strong as seven arnold S. govener of California
during the steriods period flying above him and dropping a huge sack of breast milk on both of them shrinking them both

Aaron opens his super duper breast milk repelling umbrella and avoids the shrinkage... *throws chainsaw at the annoying pixie*

As opie gets up he sees a pixie flying through the air and thinks it looks awfully sexy so shoves his huge cock up its ass and unfortulately splits the fucking pixie in half. AAAAAWWWWW poor pixie. OH SHit I think that god damned fairy had the herp.

Having coated the chainsaw with anti re-growth serum before I threw it, the chainsaw severs Opie from his manhood... Me spies Waldo in the distance, me goes and has a closer look!

damn that anti-growth serum. I had to sew my horse-cock back on fairly quickly so now every time I piss it sprays up towards my face and let me tell you that stings. I will get you Aaron. I happen to see Aaron making his way over towards waldo and I decide it is time to start throwing large turds at him. As he turns to yell something at me I threw on right in his mouth and he starts to choke on some of the corn that was in the turd.( funny I don't remember eating corn?) I start getting closer now and smear shit in his eyes. After blinding him I kick him in the face and walk away.

OOC: whoops! totally missed this one... sorry...

Aaron goes back in time to get all shot up by the fem bot but teleports back to the present to avoid the bullets actually hitting him... *scratches head, just trust me, that's how it happened*
Aaron loads catapault with flaming poo and shoots it at lady red!

simply vomits....

*steps over Aarons vomit and catches Waldo.* Come her you skinny little punk. Quit your whining or I will slice off your ear and make you eat it. And for christs sakes take off that ridiculous hat.

Swan walks into the arena loaded with guns and knives, not a section of her body uncovered by weapons strapped everywhere. First she picks up the two 9MMs at her sides and aims at each one of the contestants head, the bullets entering their skulls and exploding out the other side, brain matter and blood bursting onto the dirt floor.

Next she walks to each dead corpse and empties 20 rounds into the lifeless body, watching over her shoulders for any of the other lifeforms coming back to life.

She carefully scoops up the remains of the blob and puts it into a large mason jar and throws it into a fire in the center of the arena, the screams so loud that it breaks the glass and her oozing green form bubbles as the flames lick at it.

Now she walks to Aaron and chops off his arms and legs, the remaining amount of blood in his system leaking onto the already bloodstained earth. She tosses his limbs into the fire as well, the ooze slowly mixing with his burning flesh. "That should make for an interesting mutation." she said laughing. She poured alcohol and then salt all over Aaron's body, knowing that when his immortal body came to he would be burning and stinging with pain. *insert evil laugh here*

Finally content with killing everyone in the ring, Swan takes hold of two machine guns and starts emptying rounds into the crowd. Screams are heard from every corner of the arena. As bullets enter flesh, blood sprays everywhere, covering the spectators who enjoy the brutality of this sport.

Once everyone lies dead in the stands, Swan spots Waldo in the top of the stands and orders him to come to her or die. She watches as he walks slowly down to her, trembling in his red and white striped shirt and hat. "Stupid boy! What were you thinking running away from Daddy? You're going to be in big trouble mister!"

Swan takes Waldo and leaves the place, but leaves a note for the others that reads....


** If you wish to find Waldo, you best become better fighters than this!

Clues will be left of where you might find him... Let the hunt begin! **

Opie comes to and sees Swan walking away with Waldo. He sneaks up behind Swan and breaks her neck as her lifeless body lies on the ground opie mounts her and has his way with her every orifice. Waldo just sits huddled up against the wall weeping for the horrible things he is doing to the corpse. As opie nears climax he plunges his hunting knife into her ear in order to make a large enough opening to pour his seed into her skull.

Note to Swan *coughshowoffcough*

After pulling myself back together and blubbering like a baby from the pain I decide to watch as Opie has his way with the superdupermodalmighty and I point and laugh... then I go for sloppy seconds after clubbing Opie like a baby seal...

Just as Opie brings his little wee-wee to her head, Swan turns and bites it completely off, spitting the small appendage into the fire. While Opie lies there screaming in pain, she gets up and kicks him repeatedly in the stomach and face with her steel toed boots. Blood oozes down the side of her face from the wound that magically, like everything else in this arena, heals.

After stomping his face repeatedly she looks up to see who else was coming for her. She sighs as she notices Aaron's nub of a body coming towards her. She laughs again and takes a running start and kicks his head completely off of his body. She holds up her arms and screams, "It's good!! And the crowd goes wild!" But there wasn't a crowd... she killed them all. *insert evil laugh*

OOC: Guess my post didn't count... like, le sigh and junk...

opies clone was finished after taking such a beating but once swan was finished she was just to tired to retaliate the massive impact of a top rope maneuverlike his massive double axe handle. As swan tried to regain her footing after being knocked down opie pulls her bra strap realy realy realy realy realy realy realy realy far and then lets it snap back. Swan is swooning from such an impact that she doesn't notice opies midget forces encircling her. The evil midgets take turns singing oompa loompa and showing her their stubby little fingers. The smell of cabages overwhelms her and she loses consciousness. As she lies there unconscious the midgets start to tickle her feet to bring her back to. When she wakes up she is sitting in a chair with the back street boys playing in the background and some chinese man trying to karaoke the Beach boys. AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH THE HUMANITY.

Once more the gates of the arena opens and a small rather heavyset man is pushed into the bloodsoaked sand.
He scrathes his head and walks forward to the chaotic combatants locked in Waldo happy dismemberment and other good clean family entertainment you can trust.

He withdrew a album from his pants and opened it. "So...anyone like stamps?".

opie takes the stamps and throws them into the flames. He kicks pointless in the balls and says comon kid you gotta get with the game. As Pointless lies on the floor cuoghing from his injury opie sees Aaron over to the side and shows pointless how to play the game as he shoots Aaron in the head with a 357 just to see the blood splatter in small dropplets onto the arena floor. After smearing some blood around in the dust he realizes it reminds him of a jackson pollock and that just angers him. To relieve his frustrations Opie kicks pointless in the face and then cuts off waldos eyelids so he will never be able to blend in to the crowd again.

[soul blighter] rides in on a red horned dragon cuts off opei's head with his great sword opei dies and falls into hell chained by satan[/soul blighter]


OOC: Couldn't resist this one, lmao

..i gotta join the carnage. can i join the carnage!? if nto ignore this)

-jesus appears and hits aaron with a giant hammer. then a lawn gnome gnaws on his ankle-

(heh. hope i did this right)

opie quickly finishes building his cross to put jesus on and then Aaron and Opie hoist jesus up on the cross after nailing him to the heavy rugged wood.

Ridley Scott sends hordes of aliens to the arena...

opie sends in his midget transvestite clowns with their flesh eating ejaculate to battle the aliens. After the midgets are finished with the aliens they begin to molest and kill the aliens dogs as well.

*Grabs a midget and has me way with him while I wait for someone else to show up*

raga walks in...heeeloo?

Ridley calls Peter Jackson

A huge army of uruk-hais and orog-hais enters the arena, kills the crowd and prepares to fire arrows at the others.

Meanwhile other armies are waiting outside the colosseum to enter...

-legolas kills all things orc-like.-

ooc-- hope no one minds me joining.

ic-- Sends in evil army of Gimlis and Gandolfs to take down Legolas.

sends an evil army of muffins to kill athena....oh gawd i hope she dont eat them