I can do this. . . *takes deep breath* HELLO!!!! :meow:

this is one of my newest poems I hope you guys like it!

My deadly Kiss

Something inside me walks around death valley.
A spirit haunting the dead soul inside me.
I hear whipers telling me to run away,
But the ropes tied to my feet force me to stay.

You nailed my hands to my final cross.
All the dreams in me have been lost.
I close slowly my blood covered eyes
To see my long lasting desires fly.

I hear Thunders from far away
The memories inside don't ever escape.
You are afraid to take my life,
And yet the desire wants to come out of your eyes.

I question myself. . .

Should I cut the ropes and brake free
And uncover secrets kept inside me?
The game of life is hard to play,
And child we have lost it anyway.

You are a beatiful creature. . .
Beautiful eyes and features.
But like all of us you are blind.
Love you can not ever find.

Come with me my horrible beautiful death.
With your kiss will I end my last breath.
But with this kiss I will end your suffering,
After my kiss you will see yourself wondering. . . . .

You. . . Death. . . . You have died away. . . .

Blood slips from my frozen purlpe lips,
I sip Death's immortality like a hungry beast.
Oh beautiful Dead Rose,
I ended your life in a unrresting pose.

I wonder death valley
Haunting the ancient soul inside me
I whisper to you to run away
But the ropes tied to your feet force you to stay. . . . .

-_- What do you guys think


I need help with this thing! :help:

whoa i liked it i think you have some talent. welcome to the boards. might we see more?

[ 05:40 PM]whoa i liked it i think you have some talent. welcome to the boards. might we see more?[/QUOTE]
Thanks, hey are you serious? COOL! Way rad!


Monster


Dark so dark. . . . .
The anger controls me,
And I try to run away from me.
And I cover my eyes with blood

And when you clean them,
It seems to have dissapeared.
I might not have it there,
But I can taste it. . .

Something inside me loves it.
Something inside me hates it.

And even though you take care of me,
Tell me. . . .
What's the point of waisting your time on me?
You know that the feeling stays in me always.

Something inside me leaves it.
Something inside me misses it.

And I look at my reflection,
And I am afraid of myself.
And I fall inside my darkened eyes.

Come walk with me through the death road.
Are you afraid of me, or, you hate me?
Cross with me the ripped body
of the terrible monster you let me be.


How do i put the lil picture?[/SIZE][/color][/FONT][/SIZE][/FONT][SIZE=1][/SIZE][COLOR=red][/COLOR]

Now i get the chance to comment in your thread... by the way congrats.. and the poetry is amazing as always.. though the style is quite odd.. you rhyme in some parts but not others and a pattern is hard to see.. but nonetheless they are wonderful and i continue to be a great fan...

by the way if you want to change font or color you chose them and once you are done typing click on the "close all tags" so that if you chose COLOR=red it closes with /COLOR and so on for whatever you want to change your font to.

Also do you have AIM YIM or MSN messenger so that i can talk with you.. only if you wish, you seem like an awesome person that i can relate to very well.. so anywho me being a shy person i think i'll depart now.. keep up the good work

Wow. Your writing is literally Insane, I've never seen anything like it.
It consumes me. The rhyming is a little hard to follow sometimes. But who gives a *What?>

is insane a good thing? hmm yeah I see what you're saying, specially the monster poem. . . . hmmm I'll try to improve thanks

once again you put the color BEFORE you type something and hit Close all Tags AFTER typing what you want to type ;p

as a side note... *rapes kat* :devilflip:

oh like this thanks!

wohooo i like this thanks

oh my msn is Hottdevilgrlgn69@msn.com and my aol or aim is LoneMoonReaper

thankies and you are welcome.. before you said something about adding a little picture... what did you mean? only so that i can help.. my AIM is RavyneBlade

Like that pic that you have that silver thingy

Go to 'My Controls' and click on change or edit avatar.. don't remember which it is... and get on aim ;pppp

well I finally woke up! ! I wrote a poem at 5 and then went to sleep. No discipline at all! hmmmm. . . .

Tears that cannot be controlled

I fall to the ground from the highest star,
Toxic rain soaks me to death.
I hear your annoying voice from afar,
I wish today would I waste my last breath.

But, somehow fate does not let it be,
Not a choice to run away.
I try to open my eyes, and still I cannot see,
Not a grave where I can lay.

I look at my reflection in a puddle of rain.
From my eyes a river of black tears.
And not even the tears can get rid of the pain,
Nothing inside me but fears.

I try to stop the memory flash
But the tears cannot be controlled
This is where my hatred and disappointment clash.
This is where my story unfolds.

I rapidly faint away,
ending the battle against you.
On the soaked muddy ground I lay.
With sour tears and feelings too.

It has ended. . . the cry of rain
The deadly gray sky clears.
I will never again feel sane.
With these uncontrollable tears. . .

[quote=DeadlyReaper,Jun 26 2004, 05:50 PM] [ 05:40 PM]whoa i liked it i think you have some talent. welcome to the boards. might we see more?[/QUOTE]
Thanks, hey are you serious? COOL! Way rad!


Monster


Dark so dark. . . . .
The anger controls me,
And I try to run away from me.
And I cover my eyes with blood

And when you clean them,
It seems to have dissapeared.
I might not have it there,
But I can taste it. . .

Something inside me loves it.
Something inside me hates it.

And even though you take care of me,
Tell me. . . .
What's the point of waisting your time on me?
You know that the feeling stays in me always.

Something inside me leaves it.
Something inside me misses it.

And I look at my reflection,
And I am afraid of myself.
And I fall inside my darkened eyes.

Come walk with me through the death road.
Are you afraid of me, or, you hate me?
Cross with me the ripped body
of the terrible monster you let me be.


How do i put the lil picture?[/SIZE][/color][/FONT][/SIZE][/FONT][SIZE=1][/SIZE][/COLOR] [/quote]
[color=DarkRed]i love this one. i can relate to it so well. i hate myself, but part of me needs this self-loathing, this monster inside me, part of me knows it's all of me- i am the monster, all of me. part of me fights that fact. i love this, in shines the light on inner turmoil, which so many people have. i love that.

"Tears that cannot be controlled" (i'll just call it that) i love this one as well. you have a talent... No one can control sorrow. beautiful...

[QUOTE=darkfaery,Jun 27 2004, 07:12 PM] Thanks, hey are you serious? COOL! Way rad!


Monster


Dark so dark. . . . .
The anger controls me,
And I try to run away from me.
And I cover my eyes with blood

And when you clean them,
It seems to have dissapeared.
I might not have it there,
But I can taste it. . .

Something inside me loves it.
Something inside me hates it.

And even though you take care of me,
Tell me. . . .
What's the point of waisting your time on me?
You know that the feeling stays in me always.

Something inside me leaves it.
Something inside me misses it.

And I look at my reflection,
And I am afraid of myself.
And I fall inside my darkened eyes.

Come walk with me through the death road.
Are you afraid of me, or, you hate me?
Cross with me the ripped body
of the terrible monster you let me be.


How do i put the lil picture?[/SIZE][/color][/font][/FONT][/SIZE][/FONT][SIZE=1][/SIZE][/COLOR] [/QUOTE]
[color=DarkRed]i love this one. i can relate to it so well. i hate myself, but part of me needs this self-loathing, this monster inside me, part of me knows it's all of me- i am the monster, all of me. part of me fights that fact. i love this, in shines the light on inner turmoil, which so many people have. i love that.

"Tears that cannot be controlled" (i'll just call it that) i love this one as well. you have a talent... No one can control sorrow. beautiful... [/QUOTE]
awwww thank you! yes we all have to struggle with the creature inside. Something that you don't wish to need, but something that at the same time is vital to survive in this hell of a world. But if you let it control you, you might never come back. . . but thanks for the comment i thought nobody thought it was good i was about to just go back into my comforting coffin

well. . . I found this "thing" in my copybook I guess it was from highschool. . . hmmm very. . . uh. . . Laugh at this:

You stand there, make me feel like I can't resist, make me feel like I cannot escape. And you look at me and now I'm touching you, is it a dream? Your stare blinds me and takes my clothes off, and tonight my senses don't make sense at all. And now this is where we get physical, take it in, let it out. don't stop 'cause I'm half way there. . . You don't need to touch me, just breathe on me, and I'll open myself for you. Am I obsessed with this dream? Take me away, I don't want to be in this place anymore, reality doesn't cut it anymore. . .

Your hands run through my body, and your kisses flow around my veins, make me feel like I am already gone. Tonight my senses don't make sense at all. Tonight our imagination will run off to places we've never been before. And now that I'm there, you whisper to my ears, soft words that fall on me. Now everything seems to be red, and our thirst for *** is being quenched slowly. . . take your time, don't stop 'cause I'm already there, I feel like liquid, passing through your pores, and your sweat washes out my burns, the burns that I did to myself, because of my dreams with you.

Let your deep fantasies fall on me, and let yourself expel all you want, don't worry, let it out. It's not complicated just want to touch you . you're so hot I might need some air. I fall so slowly, that I can feel your every finger, touching me, wondering around hidden sanctuaries, and then I feel you inside me. . . don't stop 'cause I 'm half way there.

There's something about your eyes, that make me feel like I can get as high as the clouds, you don't even need to touch me just look at me. . . breathe on me, and you know that is hard for me to get away from your kiss, and you know I cannot resist. . .

And the dream takes over me, my body gets out of control, and now I see my hands running too fast from my control, and I feel myself, pushing away from reality, and I can feel your lips all over me baby. . . touch me, don't stop me because I'm half way there. Please! now my mouth opens slowly, and from the depths of my pleasure a loud sigh is born. My body twists and makes me feel like screaming, and then I see your eyes, and you smile, and you kiss me, and you touch me. And I swallow. . . hard, all the feeling, that we have inside, and then you close your eyes, you lay, giving up the fight against tonight. You sigh slowly and hard, and I take over, me on top of you, and I feel like I'm so high I can touch the stars.

And then I hear you agree to the feeling, I know I control you tonight. And I lay down making contact with your flame, and mines burn you and yours warms my body, until I feel like I can't take it anymore, the scream of desire has awaken, and my body bursts in pleasure, and I can almost expel, soon. . . . don't stop 'cause I'm half way there.

This is where we get physical, tonight. . . my senses don't make sense at all. . . .

My flesh, desires to be eaten by you, and your tongue slides down my body, and my body twists again, again and again. look at me, my sweat falls down your body, and I am in a waterfall. . . wet. . . . and my body asks for more, I feel your fingers run down my body and stop at my temple. And I'm not going to stop you, you know I'm halfway to where I want to be, and the journey, it's so hell burnig and sensual. And I'm so hot we're going to need some air.

. . . don't stop 'cause we're almost there. . .

And this is were we get physical. . . Tonight, my senses don't make sense at all


alot of reading huh? :devilnaughty:

these words mean alot to me..in a way i will never forget.
your first poem rocked! i loved it!
*slaps on glittery black rose sticker in that one*
great! :meow:

ooo organized rhymes, i love it to death. and i can feel your pain, and see your words form into pictures before my eyes, you are a talented writer and i can't wait to see what else you have to show us

*drooooools and runs off to change her underwear*

awww I feel loved thanks blackdragon, thank you oh great Sasha! I'm getting addicted to this. . . Oh NO! I'm being possesed! hmmm way cool! ^_^

its easy to get addicted.. believe me i live on these forums..

oh and i forgot one thing... GET ON AIM!!! hehe

Well here's my new poem, I received helped in a line and in rhyming from a dear new friend. . .


Winter. . .

Silver peaks lighted by the frozen moon.
Seems like the sun has died to soon.
Angels slumber in the frozen sky
After this again I will see your eyes.

The waves do not dance today.
In the sleeping snow I will lay
Moon of winter has been finally born
The sun has been killed with rose's thorns.

And as the violin is being played,
Your voice cannot longer fade.
White as snow wolves run towards me
The war has just begun, fate will not let it be.

A war that seems to be endless
A newborn between the war, defenseless.
Sweet bell sounds in the night to soothe the pain
So that the newborn's tears do not cause rain.

New moon starting to write a new story ,
Of a battle won by death without glory.
And as the angels gently awake
Death with a kiss their lives will take

And the moon starts crying silver tears
Finally they've awaken, her unwanted fears.
Finally soaked in total confusion
Wishing that today was just an illusion. . .

Demons and darkness taking over,
Winter moon tonight death will be your lover.
Angels nor sun dance Today,
Weakened by cold in the snow I will lay. . . .

Thank you Astareal

your writings are amazing, definitely keep it up