As i lay upon the ground i wonder if i am truely awake,
I lay and look upon the moon and ponder my fate,
I look into the darkness and think who am i and why am i here,
I watch with unblinking eyes as the people age year by year,
And yet i stay the same,
As i stand i wonder if i am sane,
I disapear into the night never to be seen again.
By:
Nemesis L'tronchae
Full Version: Something To Ponder
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Thanks i will rember that
Welcome to the forums! I'm Rachel..... I liked this poem a lot... I know what it's like to question reality... to wonder if something is just a dream... A lot of people ask these questions. Who am I? Why am I here? but you've placed them in an abstract setting, and i like that a lot, it gives it a new tone. it seems like you're trying to understand things changing, and i like how it ends. it's worded very artistically.
but here's a little advice: not all poems have to rhyme, sometimes rhyming interrupts the flow like in this lines: and yet i stay the same, i stand and wonder if i am sane
i like it, but the rhyming interrupts the flow... this poem seemed very natural, but it seemed like you were organizing your thoughts.
try just writing how you feel, freewrite... don't go back and fix mistakes, don't change the wording, don't worry about if it rhymes, just write what comes natural as an expression of your feeling.
i'd really like to see more of your work. you have a talent and i'm interested to see where you'll go with it.
A Fan,
~*heart*~ Rachel
but here's a little advice: not all poems have to rhyme, sometimes rhyming interrupts the flow like in this lines: and yet i stay the same, i stand and wonder if i am sane
i like it, but the rhyming interrupts the flow... this poem seemed very natural, but it seemed like you were organizing your thoughts.
try just writing how you feel, freewrite... don't go back and fix mistakes, don't change the wording, don't worry about if it rhymes, just write what comes natural as an expression of your feeling.
i'd really like to see more of your work. you have a talent and i'm interested to see where you'll go with it.
A Fan,
~*heart*~ Rachel
The last poem was gorgeous and i understand the meaning behind it very well. Many a time i lay and stare up at the ceiling or the sky and just think about the world, there is so much, the past, the future and all those around you. The years slip by and can never be reclaimed and you begin to wonder am i really here, am i really real, am i insane or is it all a dream. Well yeah...now that i've pretty much quoted your whole poem just know that i adored it and i hope that i may be graced by your words again soon 
hey astarael!!! i know how that feels as well..... i love looking up at the stars... and mostly when i'm deep in thought i'll be staring into space... i can see how this poem blends looking at the moon and what she's thinking... i really can't wait to see more... ::eyes glued to screen::
a fan,
~*heart*~ Rachel
a fan,
~*heart*~ Rachel
as i watch those around me i wonder if this life i live is real.
I wonder if i am real.
If this life is but a dream.
As i watch them pass by me i think to my self i am not real.
I am but a ghost of the past.
You do not know me and you never will.
I do not exist though i am all to real.
You never seem to see me but I am always there.
I am but a shadow, one of meny.
Never noticed but ever watching.
As I walk down the road I think to myself are any of us truely real.
by:
nemesis l'tronchae
you all seemd to like the last one so i thought i would toss another one out there
I wonder if i am real.
If this life is but a dream.
As i watch them pass by me i think to my self i am not real.
I am but a ghost of the past.
You do not know me and you never will.
I do not exist though i am all to real.
You never seem to see me but I am always there.
I am but a shadow, one of meny.
Never noticed but ever watching.
As I walk down the road I think to myself are any of us truely real.
by:
nemesis l'tronchae
you all seemd to like the last one so i thought i would toss another one out there
oh and thanks for the advice 
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